My attempt to do a self-conversation using the Arthur Aron set of 36 questions.
Aren't we the most important person to ourselves?
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
My granddads. They left too soon. Outside family, it would be Mahendra Singh Dhoni, Prithviraj Chauhan, Sam Maneckshaw.
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
My humour would be stretching it. Anonymity is a gift I am told so, No.
3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
Not for the ones I love.
4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?
Brunch by the sea, evening by a fire and a dinner under the stars.
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
Last week maybe. High on a new song.
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
The mind of a 30-year-old. The mind is a dangerous place.
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Not a clue but that thought always crosses my mind when I board an aircraft.
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
Wine, food and vacations
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
Parents and Grandparents
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Nothing
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
Ok
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
Letting go of work
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
Why can't people get along?
14. Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
Sending my parents on a world tour : )
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
My parents knowing they raised me right and I ensuring that the belief is never questioned.
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
Faith
17. What is your most treasured memory?
Childhood years with my sister especially Pathankot 1999-2000
18. What is your most terrible memory?
Losing my granddads
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
Work on my health.
20. What does friendship mean to you?
Being there
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Massive. Mentoring, support, calling out the BS when needed.
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
Ok
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
Very. Childhood was the best.
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Friend, guide. We switch roles without warning.
25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."
This exercise is one-sided.
This exercise is to reflect on the past and plan the future.
This exercise is to help
26. Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
...an entire tub of Baskin Robbins chocolate+mint ice cream or biryani for that matter.
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
Life history, important people, ideologies and points of view, brew type of coffee & tea.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them: be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
NA
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
Done. Also, way too many.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
No idea. Not a cry person.
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
Done . Too many.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
Close friends and family. Sensitive points or times of their lives.
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
Broken friendships. Nothing that is unsaid.
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
Photo frames.
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
Grandparents, parents...Almost everyone.
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
Done.
Aren't we the most important person to ourselves?
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
My granddads. They left too soon. Outside family, it would be Mahendra Singh Dhoni, Prithviraj Chauhan, Sam Maneckshaw.
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
My humour would be stretching it. Anonymity is a gift I am told so, No.
3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
Not for the ones I love.
4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?
Brunch by the sea, evening by a fire and a dinner under the stars.
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
Last week maybe. High on a new song.
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
The mind of a 30-year-old. The mind is a dangerous place.
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Not a clue but that thought always crosses my mind when I board an aircraft.
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
Wine, food and vacations
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
Parents and Grandparents
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Nothing
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
Ok
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
Letting go of work
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
Why can't people get along?
14. Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
Sending my parents on a world tour : )
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
My parents knowing they raised me right and I ensuring that the belief is never questioned.
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
Faith
17. What is your most treasured memory?
Childhood years with my sister especially Pathankot 1999-2000
18. What is your most terrible memory?
Losing my granddads
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
Work on my health.
20. What does friendship mean to you?
Being there
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
Massive. Mentoring, support, calling out the BS when needed.
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
Ok
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
Very. Childhood was the best.
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Friend, guide. We switch roles without warning.
25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."
This exercise is one-sided.
This exercise is to reflect on the past and plan the future.
This exercise is to help
26. Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
...an entire tub of Baskin Robbins chocolate+mint ice cream or biryani for that matter.
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
Life history, important people, ideologies and points of view, brew type of coffee & tea.
28. Tell your partner what you like about them: be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
NA
29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
Done. Also, way too many.
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
No idea. Not a cry person.
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
Done . Too many.
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
Close friends and family. Sensitive points or times of their lives.
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
Broken friendships. Nothing that is unsaid.
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
Photo frames.
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
Grandparents, parents...Almost everyone.
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
Done.
Comments